I just really want to fucking post this.

Tuts My Barreh

"No one likes to read emo shit"

I have been trying to blog for the past few days but couldn't ejaculate all these overcrowding thoughts into words. Somewhere 50000 miles up in the sky, a girl is on her way to Vancouver to meet her lover. No one knows when she's coming back, if she ever will come back. No one knows anything about her, really. Everyone thinks they know her well, but really, they don't have a fucking clue. She's just a mysterious girl with a complicated mind trying to find true love. True love in various forms: Country, city, time frame, nature, smell, or a person. Concurrently, 50000 miles down on the ground, in the 8th floor office on 33rd street and 6th ave, people are literally going nuts and talking ape shit. Thoughts of resignation circulated the office. But everyone has to suck it up, because no one can afford to be unemployed in this economic crisis where middle aged 30, 40 year old unemployed loafers are trying to get a job at American Apparel or worse, Duane Reade.

Andrew Fuckface said "no one likes to read emo shit Jenny. No one cares. People like to read about .....fun things!"

If I ever have the intelligence to take up writing as a professional, my style of writing will take up much of Bukowski's. And if no one likes to read my writings then fuck ya'll, I'll just be a truck driver and drink more whiskey. Bukowski style.


Since I haven't been able to formulate my thoughts, I started browsing online for films that I would be interested in seeing. Films that somehow can identify with these thoughts in my head, and capable of expressing them for me, verbally and visually. I eventually stumbled upon one, that I think can serve as a discharger of my thoughts.





"Everything is more complicated than you think. You only see a tenth of what is true. There are a million little strings attached to every choice you make; you can destroy your life every time you choose. But maybe you won't know for twenty years. And you'll never ever trace it to its source. And you only get one chance to play it out. Just try and figure out your own divorce. And they say there is no fate, but there is: it's what you create. Even though the world goes on for eons and eons, you are here for a fraction of a fraction of a second. Most of your time is spent being dead or not yet born. But while alive, you wait in vain, wasting years, for a phone call or a letter or a look from someone or something to make it all right. And it never comes or it seems to but doesn't really. And so you spend your time in vague regret or vaguer hope for something good to come along. Something to make you feel connected, to make you feel whole, to make you feel loved. And the truth is I'm so angry and the truth is I'm so fucking sad, and the truth is I've been so fucking hurt for so fucking long and for just as long have been pretending I'm OK, just to get along, just for, I don't know why, maybe because no one wants to hear about my misery, because they have their own, and their own is too overwhelming to allow them to listen to or care about mine. Well, fuck everybody. Amen."

yea...that's about it.

And, at last. Let's all be a dishwasher, truck driver and loader, mail carrier, guard, gas station attendant, stock boy, warehouse worker, shipping clerk, post office clerk, parking lot attendant, Red Cross orderly, and elevator operator. Let's all play a Bukowski role. Let's fail at life together. Let's smoke and drink and watch......Factotum.

Life in the East Village Day 2

Life in the East Village has been pretty awesome being that I'm steps to all my favorite bars and restaurants. Took a cab from work Friday, directly to my "new" home, for 9 days. After dropping off my baggages, I immediately met up with Kaela at the Bourgeois Pig for some wine and appetizers. The Bourgeois Pig is one of my favorite bars in the East Village because of it's extensive collection of wine. And I love wine more than any other alcoholic beverages. I ordered a glass of bubble Chardonney and it was more than satisfying. We went back to the apt afterward and Megan came to meet us. We watched Flight of the Conchords and drank more wine until midnight and headed to some neighborhood bars. We first made a stop at Ella where John was DJing. We got some free wine at the bar because apparently the bartender was weird and retarded. Think he was giving out free drinks to anybody, as long as you didn't offer to pay him. Megan wanted to go to Home Sweet Home after a couple of drinks at Ella because she wanted to stalk this guy she is obsessed with, the bartender at Home Sweet Home. That's when craziness integrated into the night. We were so drunk that we somehow managed to got lost in the lower east and the next thing I know, Megan was climbing some park's metal bars and the next thing I know I followed. I didn't realized until afterward told by Kaela and Megan that I was anally stuck in between the metal bars while I was attempting to get myself over the fucking fence. It was absolutely totally unnecessary for us to make that route and more particularly climbing over any physical objects but we were so drunk that we just bypassed any obstacles that came our way in order to get to Home Sweet Home. We ended up terminating the night earlier than predicted because we were all too trashed and Kaela wasn't in a good mood due to unhealthy relationship with her boyfriend. I passed out when I got back to the apt, only to find myself waking up this morning, watching Sex and the City and drinking juice at an unreasonably early hour for a Saturday to wake up to. The rest of the day was pretty occupied. Met up with some high school friends in the neighborhood for brunch. Shopped around Soho for a while and spent a ridiculous amount of money at Zara, tho I felt that it was worth it. Kaela came over the apt later at noon, and we smoked and watched Flight of the Conchords and retardedly laugh the hour away. Met up with my friend Yee that I haven't seen a long time in the Lower East for dinner and drank a bottle of wine and played a bit of catching up at a pretty nice restaurant called Frankie. Yee used to be my housemate in Brooklyn when I was in college. We lived in the same private house but different floors. She seems to be doing pretty well now. Yee is a graphic designer and just established her own business with her photographer boyfriend and has a studio in Union Square. Her boyfriend does most of Marc Jacob ads, which is pretty sweet. I, of course, didn't seize the opportunity to inquire if they can get discounts at the Jacob store but resulted in a failure. Which was okay, it's not like I can still afford anything even with the discounts. After the dinner, I came back to the apt and tried watching episodes of Big Love and passed out until I got a text from Tina with an invitation to go to Tribeca Grand. Being that I am fucking living in the East Village right now, it is totally effortless for me to make that trip, and so without a second thought, I changed and chain-smoked my way to the party. Randomly bumped into Phil on my way there, much full of my surprise because I haven't see him for such a long time. It was pleasant to see him again. Got free drinks and bumped into more people at Tribeca Grand, the day has been playing itself well.

I'm not even making an effort to make this entry anywhere close to being well-written because I am fucking tired and I just don't give a fuck at this point what people think. Therefore, I'm gonna put an end, get this over with (because I have been trying to finish this entry for 2 days already), and go to sleep.

Goodnight friends. Goodmorning East Village. Goodbye self.

Royksopp :: Junior

Royksopp came out with a new album Junior. They are one of my favorite electronic bands aside from The Knife. No electronic groups can ever replace The Knife in my heart. Here I am sitting on my bed listening to their new album thru the Pitchfork site, and being greatly disappointed already with the first couple of tracks. Usually I would only waste time to listen to no more than 3 tracks from an album to determine if I like it or not. For the new Royksopp album, I already didn't like their hit single "Happy Up Here". It is way too poppy for my tolerance. By the third track, I was ready to rate the album as "unsatisfactory" and move on to listen to other music. I hesitated, however, thinking that Royksopp can't possibly suck that badly. I refused to accept it. So I listened to a couple more tracks, and still wasn't that much more impressed. Then I decided to give in my last effort and plugged in my PX100 into my laptop and stream it through (in my opinion) the best headphones ever. I listened again from the beginning. The album immediately came to life. I plugged it in at the best timing because the fourth track "This Must Be It" is actually an awesome song. Because it sounds exactly like The Knife. HA! The title of the song was a bit ironic too at the moment. This must be it! HA! The bass in those headphone is no joke. It's better than both sets of speakers in my room. Again, if you don't own a PX100 yet, I strongly suggest you get them. It's better than listening to music on pot. Often times when I'm using the PX100 in my room I have to lock the door because it gets me so sucked into the music that I'm detached from the world into an existentialism of my own that I get so paranoid if some foreign forces interrupt me, like my mom, who's literally the alien in this apartment once I have these headphones on. I did some research on the song and realized that it sounds exactly like The Knife because The Knife IS in it. Karin Dreijer is actually a guest singer on that track. How fucking awesome is that. I can never imagine my favorite two electronic bands collaborating together. This is totally blowing my mind.

Every Saturday or Sunday, I take violin lessons at Julliard. I haven't practiced much on the materials that were distributed to me from my instructor. I'm dead meat. The violin is one of the hardest string instruments to learn I think. It's so refine and meticulous. Unlike the guitar which has frets, the violin has no frets to stop the strings, the player must know exactly where to place the fingers on the strings to play with good intonation. I'm still trying to hold the bow with perfect placement of my fingers. And the tunes coming out of my violin are like chicken screeches right now. However, I have confidence that my skills will improve tremendously in no time. Since I have a really good instructor. He's graduating Julliard with a bachalor degree in Violin and planning to get a master degree in violin next year. He's a true violinist. He's also nice enough to charge me at a highly reasonable rate. Which is rather nice of him. I should've done some practicing today. But instead, I wasted time taking pictures of things in my room. I was playing around with my SLR camera and tried to explore different settings for taking better pictures. I thought that one of the premise of good photography is making dead subjects look alive and I tried playing around with that theme a little. Here are the results

This is Chuck Bass, my fishy.









As you can see, I managed to make a live fish look dead. Following are attempts of making dead subjects come alive.












Evidently, they look dead. Fail. As you're reading this, you should probably realized that I've been indulging myself in resurrections. I think that what I'm ultimately trying to accomplish is making MYSELF come "alive". Because in contrary, I'm a living dead. Fo realzz.

What can you possibly say to make yourself sound stupid? Apparently everything.

Because of a holiday called Pass Over, I have the privilege of having a four day weekend this week. Wednesday was Megan's birthday. We went to a vegetarian restaurant called Red Bamboo in the West Village to celebrate her 23rd. I was a bit skeptical with soy made "meat" in the beginning and didn't have a good general feeling that the food will be flavorful. Of course, it turned out much of a surprise. The food was heavenly delicious. If vegetarians eat that shit everyday I would become a vegetarian this minute. Everybody was wasted because we ordered 3 bottles of wine. Afterward, we went to Home Sweet Home to have drinks. At that point, I can no longer consume anymore alcholic beverages, so I basically just sat there bobbing my head to the Gothic Techno that was playing. Went home early because I was tired as hell. Going out on a workday is challenging at times.

For my day off today I didn't do much. I downloaded a lot of music. I finally got Fleet Foxes' entire album. I can't even explain how amazing it is. Purely magical. I also downloaded Deerhunter's new album. I love it. I've learned that a lot of people aren't that fond of them because they think that the lead singer creeps the shit out of them. Surely, he's creepy. I'm not gonna doubt that. However, I think that people need to get over the skeleton coke head of a resemblance and pay more attention to their music. I'm literally obsessed with the song 'agoraphobia'. I've found a video on youtube, and I like it as much as I like the song. I love interpretive dancing. I wish I have the opportunities to interpretive dance more. Tho over the period of time, I think that I've somehow transformed my desire and energy to interpretive dancing to fire spinning.



All these awesome albums that I've dled recently is telling me that I need to invest in some good headphones since my Sennheiser just broke recently. Sad Face. It was the best headphones I've ever had and it made everything sound 10x better, at least. Trust me, owning a set of good headphone really makes listening to music a MUCH better experience. If you love listening to music, like REALLY love listening to music, you should invest in some good headphones. Once you've heard the difference, you can never go back. So I did some researching on the web tonight, trying to find an even better headphone than my last one and I couldn't help but keep coming back to my old ones. I googled top 10 headphones and evidently they're still holding up their spot. I've found a couple of articles that raved about the Koss PortaPro headphone but I really can't get over the appearance of it.



Wearing that headphone would make me look ridiculously foolish. Seriously. People wouldn't even want to say hi to me wearing that shit. So, I have concluded to just replace my old Sennheiser PX100, which has a much better appearance and holds the same level of sound quality.



This entry was supposed to be published yesterday night. I fell asleep halfway writing it. Shows how exciting my life has been. I've been thinking that my blog sounds really dumb. And I'm starting to hate everything I wrote. Don't be surprised if you see a couple of entries missing in the future.

Can Monday be Funday?

There has been an on-going pattern between me and Kaela to use our work email accounts to exchange non work-related emails. We often use "important" as our subject header but we always discuss anything but importance. Here are examples of what we talk about at work.

Sender: Jenny Wong
Subject: important (upper case IMPORTANT actually means important work-related matters so we use lower case to distinguish)

dude have you seen the pictures in my computer?! OMG OMG I can't believe what I just saw

Sender: Kaela Kennedy
Re subject: important

no what

Sender: Jenny Wong
Re re subject: important

there's a picture of R.K's nipple in my computer OMG OMG OMG (R.K is one of our bosses) and quite a few slutty shots of I believe his wife?? and there's also a slutty picture of Jennifer Aniston. OMG OMG I've been entertained by it for the pass 30 mins.

Sender: Kaela Kenndy
RE re re subject: important

be there in one second lol

Sender: Jenny Wong
Subject: important

Did you see the article on memory erasing?

Sender: Kaela Kenndy
Re subject: important

Not yet....

----END OF CONVO

Sender: Kaela Kennedy
Subject: important

dude did you see what J**y is wearing today? OMG it's totally driving me crazy. I can't work with him like this. Not wearing that. It's hideous! I can't work with him like that nah uh.

Sender: Jenny Wong
Re subject: important

no I didn't. Did you see what M**k*y is wearing tho? I'm shocked.

-----END OF CONVO

Sender: Kaela Kennedy
Subject: important

dude I'm going happy hour after work with Black Kids. Come!!

Sender: Jenny Wong
Re subject: important

dude I don't know man, I can only think of food and how sleepy I am right now. They sound so familiar tho. I think I attempted to illegally dl their songs in the past but failed. Also, it's raining like shit out, I just wanna go home and sleep.

Sender: Kaela Kennedy
Re re subject: important

yea they're pretty big in Europe I'M NOT GONNA TEACH YOUR BOYFRIEND HOW TO DANCE DANCE DANCE dude just come out for one drink at least

Sender: Jenny Wong
RE re subject: important

I shall contemplate on that.......

Not only do we exchange non work-related emails. We also BB msger each other usually telling each other how much we're falling asleep. We also gchat during lunch hour. It's ridiculous. I talk about how sleepy I am every single day. It's not even funny.

Tonight, I got swayed into going happy hour supposedly with the Black Kids. We ended up going for sushi before hand and drank a big bottle of saki. Megan met with us afterward. Black kids didn't actually make it out for happy hours because I think they had to prepare for the show. Kaela got a +1 on the guestlist to see the show, and I suggested that she should go with Megan, because I'm really fucking sleepy anyways and I'm not a big fan of Black Kids, tho Mates of States are headlining.....but I saw them live before at APW and they weren't any good. So I'm not missing out too much. I took them to Black and White after sushi, which is a new spot I discovered recently in the east village. It's kind of hidden because it's semi-underground. It's a really cool bar tho and they often play kick-ass music. It's a really chill place. I like taking people to my newly discovered awesome spot because I'm almost certain that no one knows about it. And now, referring back to the question of my entry tonight "Can Monday be Funday?" Megan said "I love happy hours man" Kaela continued "I literally had to beg Jenny to come out" me "truth"

Naut Phaen Thai

I got a nuat phaen thai today (aka thai massage), it was more painful than I predicted. It was probably the most intense full body massage I have ever received in my life. For those of you who aren't familiar with nuat phaen thai (I could easily say thai massaging but I think its more awesome saying nuat phaen thai) it is a type of massaging where the therapist uses her hands, knees, legs, and feet to move you into a series of yoga-like stretches. some say that it's like doing yoga without any work. For a much better understanding, I have found a video on youtube for your reference.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXKNf0PQ7ro

Unfortunately, that is the only video I found of naut phaen thai on youtube that's not weird and creepy. While I was receiving a fucking nuat phaen thai, I thought I was being physically tortured. There was this part where they use their feet to massage your back spine, in which they literally step on you while holding on to a bar from the ceiling so they can apply the right amount of pressure. I literally almost died from choking. When she was "applying pressure" aka stepping on my back I couldn't even fucking breathe. The whole experience was as if I got brutally raped by a woman. Tho afterward, all my muscle tensions were relieved. I think that the outcome of nuat phaen thai is essentially beneficial, if one is tough enough to tolerate the pain. After the nuat phaen thai, I'm strongly convinced that I would have no problem at all getting a tattoo.

Chuck Bass

I got a fishy yesterday and his name is Chuck Bass. He's a king betta, so you can also call him King Bass if you'd like. He's the biggest one in the betta kingdom. I got him a nice big bowl, it cost more than the fish itself. I also got some gravels for the bowl and food, and everything came out to be much more expensive than I thought it would be. But it's all worth it, I love Chuck Bass very much.

Tonight I went to the Black and White bar in the east village to cheer for my friend William who was having a go-go dance off competition against a girl. It was some secretive, burning man challenge thing, and apparently you don't know who you're competing against with until night off. Well little did we know, the "girl" turned out to be a 70 year old lady. It was like the worst case scenario EVER. William tried to back out from the competition but being that we're such supportive friends, we gave him faith and encouragement, to continue with it. So we basically said "we came all the way out here, you better take that freakin jacket off, cos we KNOW you've got some fucking awesome top underneath there, stop hiding it, and show us some ACTIONS." It was the MOST BIZARRE/EMBARRASSING/HILARIOUS/AWKWARD/CAN'T BELIEVE A FUCKING 70 YEAR OLD WOMAN IS GO GO DANCING/EMBARRASSING/BIZARRE/AWKWARD/OMG THE 70 YEAR OLD WOMAN JUST TOOK OFF HER TOP/BIZARRE/AWKWARD?/EMBARRASSING/MY FRIEND IS SO MUCH YOUNGER AND HOTTER AND HE JUST RIPPED HIS SHIRT OFF AND HE'S GOT ABS/THIS IS REALLY FUCKING SAD/AWKWARD???/I HAVE BEER ALL OVER MYSELF FUCK/EMBARRASSING performance I have ever seen.

My friend's current away status is "Jenny Wong is a very angry girl" and I responded with "yes I'm angst".....and she responded "yes well you're also 12" and I responded "yes it's true" But I really am feeling angst tonight. So I'm going to comment on this fucking Jaydiohead mash-up album thing that's being "widely" spread on the internet right now. I personally HATE Jay-Z. I don't like raps. I wish he can stop messing with my favorite bands. Radiohead is good enough by themselves, they don't need your freakin gangsta raps to mash it up. Jay-Z also did a mash-up with Led Zeppelin before. It was a joke. It was terrible. Led Zeppelin is legendary. They RULE. They don't need stupid rappings in their songs.

I'm obviously really angst right now. I'm not normally like this. I'm also writing in poor english, or not english at all. This is a bad entry and I'm going to stop and go to sleep.

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